Hey!

Here's my set of goals for the week.

1. Make 3 workout classes this week.
2. Workout out 5 days this week.
3. Try a new, healthy recipe (may have to be closer to the weekend).

I know this is a quick post, but I wanted to get one in, and I wanted to set some achievables for the next few days. 

MIA and Threshold

I just realized it's been a few days since my last post, and the last one was fairly serious...

Well, that situation is still very much a reality, but I promise I didn't jump off the deep end (I know, you could almost picture me, at least the version of me you have created given my lack of photo, perched on the edge of a carton of Ben and Jerry's, ready to dive in)!

I am in full-blown, I have a full-time job that thinks it's two full-time jobs but only wants to pay me half a full-time job taking graduate classes on top of things in the middle of finals week but still have to make the holiday cookie packages and Christmas shop and get the car detailed you want me to pay how much? panic mode!  This weekend, and this coming week, have been, and will be, insane! 

BUT, I am finally under my first threshold, and I have my sights on 245, even in this craziness.  I will do better to keep things updated!  (Especially since I definitely have some followers...sometimes I had them, and sometimes I didn't....I think blogger has been having some growing pains!)  I'm excited to have you along on the journey with me! 

When Life is Tough...

So, I got one of those phone calls yesterday.  You know, the one that let's you know that either your life, or the life of someone very close to you, is about to turn upside down, inside out, the mother-load hitting the fan.

As the call unfolded, I literally felt the weight of the world descend upon my shoulders.  I consciously remember feeling the weight as they fell forward.  Sitting at my desk, pen still poised over the paper I was halfway through grading.

Now, I'm not going to say that I have the worst life imaginable, because I don't.  I am blessed with people I love, and people who love me.  But, I am no stranger to life-altering moments and lesson-learning.  I am all too familiar with the feeling of the rug being ripped from under my feet.

My challenge this time around is to get through this situation without sabbotaging myself.  I'm not a heavy drinker, I don't smoke, and I've never touched drugs.  I learned, from a very early age to eat through my stress and feelings.  I cannot do this anymore, and I'm being challenged very early in this new commitment!

Tonight, after I got home, I did some chores, and then I went to Zumba.  I didn't want to, as it is a late class, but I feel much better knowing I made that choice.  It was a good choice.  And now, to continue the good choicies tomorrow...

At the Threshold, just not across Or When the Elephant in the Room is You...

So, I just got back from another Zumba class.  It was both better and worse than the last two times.  Better in that I am catching on...worse in that I let the doubts creep in for a while tonight. 

You see, I'm kind of a tall girl...well, not kind of, I am.  And being exactly 250 lbs, I am not easy to miss!  No matter where I looked in the room full of mirrors tonight, I could see myself...even when another was directly in front of me...and it was difficult in that it was a constant reminder in how far I have to go.  I was wearing a gray shirt tonight, so at one point, with my long ponytail flapping around, I truly thought I looked like a funky elephant...

But I keep reminding myself that I didn't quite get here all at once, and I won't leave here all at once.  I think that's also why I've decided to set my sights on 5 lb intervals. 

Which leads me to my week one achievement.  Although I haven't passed my first goal, tonight the scale said I was directly at it, which means I'm close, and down 5 lbs this week!

So, I guess, enough of the pity party...I am now staring down 245...bring it!

Flat Out!

I took another aerobics class tonight.  I am a great balance of coordinated uncoordinated.  Some moves, I catch on with ease, and just as that happens, we move on, and I'm hopelessly lost, forced to march in place until I do catch on.  Then guess what?  We move on!  (And, it's also an interesting sign when you feel halfway through the workout when the instructor yells "And that's the end of the warm up!"  Oh dear...)

Afterwards, I came home and made a pizza with multi-grain Flat Out bread.  If you've never used it, you must!  It's 100 calories (some of the options are 90 and others are 120), and it's great for all kinds of uses, from pizzas to wraps to dippers.

To make my pizza, I throw some veggies in a pan on the stove (whatever you want).  To save time, I always have frozen onion, pepper, and celery medleys I can toss into the pan.  While they defrost and begin to cook up, I take some canadian bacon slices and use a pizza cutter to cut them into smaller bits (you can use quite a bit of canadian bacon for relatively few calories.  I use 1/4 of a package, and mine works out to be 35 calories!)  I throw those in with the veggies.  When that's starting to brown up, I throw half a can of crushed pineapple in the pan.  This both deglazes the pan, and creates a grilled pineapple flavor.  Yum!  I hit the preheat on the oven and throw my piece of flat out in while its preheating.  Just keep an eye on it.  You don't want it to brown, instead, you just want it to crisp up a bit.  By the time you pull it out of the oven, the mixture in the pan should be cooking out most of the juices.  Spread pizza sauce on the bread, put your toppings on, and sprinkle with part-skim mozzarella cheese.  By now the oven should have reached 350.  Throw it in until the cheese melts.  You can even broil it a bit if you like the cheese bubbly.  And voila!  You have a fantastic pizza!  Mine comes out to just under 300 calories...for the entire thing!  Wahoo!

Let me know if you try it, or if you have other favorite, healthy recipes!

Science Fiction...

I am laughing a bit because I just tried to mobile blog...then blog traditionally via mobile technology...none of it has gone well. I am going to try to post this, and will post again when I have an actual keyboard!

Playing Hide and Hide with the Scale...

So, I seem to have a real issue with the scale.  About a decade ago, I avoided it like the plague.  I mean, I went YEARS without looking at the number (even going as far as telling the nurse's at the doctor's office to "Keep it to yourself.").  And that was when I was still in 1derland.  It's this precise ostrich-like behavior that allowed me to vault into the 200s.  I didn't just wander in aimlessly.  Instead, I bull-dozed my way in, and the first time I saw a number that began with 2, it was followed by a 65.  And then I proceeded to stick my head in the sand again.

I can honestly say I don't know what my heaviest weight was.  I am guessing 275.  Wow, right? 

When I have several bad habit days in a row, I tend to revert back to the ostrich behavior with the scale, and so I have come to the conclusion that I have to weigh myself daily.  Yes, this presents an entire new host of problems, because I want to see results daily, but I cannot afford anymore vaulting!

So, I seem to be closing in on my first benchmark, and I find myself looking forward to reading the numbers in the morning...